Oh, they’re offensive, all right.

Welp, sorry Taiwan, looks like you’ll be a lot more on your own in a year or two.

We will be too busy invading:

Venezuela

Canada

Mexico

Greenland

Afghanistan (again)

Panama?

… and also ourselves.

I do understand Trumps position. America, after all, is surrounded by enemies and direly needs territory to expand. The obvious way is eastward, where Greenland is begging to be liberated and the infamous, aggressive and illegimate state of Denmark has been testing America’s patience for too long…