I don’t think it’s unlucky just stupid. In bdsm we have something called RACK (risk aware consensual kink) where before a scene or activity you have to study risks, anatomy, and physiology as deeply as you can and then do negotiations with your partner where you discuss all the risks and establish safe words and alternative non-verbal cues, and everything that could go wrong and the protocol that will be followed if it does go wrong, while changing things and substituting some aspects with others that would achieve the same goal but more safely.
You also generally don’t participate in extreme activities with a new partner especially if someone is inexperienced.
I do rope. I’m out of practice, but that’s my jam. I know someone online and IRL, but mostly online, that really wants to be tied up. Getting them to meet up again in person again so we can talk through an entire scene, and make sure that it’s fully safe and consensual is like pulling teeth. It’s… Worrisome. I know that some of the things they want simply aren’t going to happen; breath play is already extremely risky (altho, hmmmmm, I just realized that I could clip and O2 saturation monitor to a toe, and that would alert to dangerous conditions…), doing it when tied up vastly increases the risk. They’re experienced in other BDSM activities, but not rope work, and I get the feeling that they haven’t been overly concerned with safety in the past.
I wouldn’t call sealing someone’s entire head in Saran Wrap and plastics bags, and then leaving them unattended, “unlucky”
The lady has 3 kids and is an adult. How could she not know plastic bags are a suffocation hazard. Yes breath play is a real thing, and it is known to be inherently risky, which is why any amount of research would tell you to either avoid it entirely or have a quick way to restore airflow, and to never leave your partner unattended while doing this shit.
I’ve done kinky shit. It’s really not that fucking hard to not kill someone. Especially if you’re getting 11 grand for it, I’d expect a little thought and research put into the encounter.
You could defend that as a “heat of the moment” kind of thing. It was the victim’s kink, after all. 4 years is not unjust, but I would have also accepted 2 years.
Considering that the article talks about the accusers trying for second degree murder, it looks like they were looking to get the maximum punishment rather than plain old justice. I don’t see why they would do that.
Yes, that is true. It was very irresponsible. Like a child, like Pippi Longstockings: " I’ve never done this, so think I can do it", like Nike: “just do it”.
4 years seems kind of harsh even. Considering it was all just very dumb and unlucky. Not unjustified, just the top of the range I would sentence.
I don’t think it’s unlucky just stupid. In bdsm we have something called RACK (risk aware consensual kink) where before a scene or activity you have to study risks, anatomy, and physiology as deeply as you can and then do negotiations with your partner where you discuss all the risks and establish safe words and alternative non-verbal cues, and everything that could go wrong and the protocol that will be followed if it does go wrong, while changing things and substituting some aspects with others that would achieve the same goal but more safely.
You also generally don’t participate in extreme activities with a new partner especially if someone is inexperienced.
A kind of “due dilligence”
Heh.
I do rope. I’m out of practice, but that’s my jam. I know someone online and IRL, but mostly online, that really wants to be tied up. Getting them to meet up again in person again so we can talk through an entire scene, and make sure that it’s fully safe and consensual is like pulling teeth. It’s… Worrisome. I know that some of the things they want simply aren’t going to happen; breath play is already extremely risky (altho, hmmmmm, I just realized that I could clip and O2 saturation monitor to a toe, and that would alert to dangerous conditions…), doing it when tied up vastly increases the risk. They’re experienced in other BDSM activities, but not rope work, and I get the feeling that they haven’t been overly concerned with safety in the past.
I wouldn’t call sealing someone’s entire head in Saran Wrap and plastics bags, and then leaving them unattended, “unlucky”
The lady has 3 kids and is an adult. How could she not know plastic bags are a suffocation hazard. Yes breath play is a real thing, and it is known to be inherently risky, which is why any amount of research would tell you to either avoid it entirely or have a quick way to restore airflow, and to never leave your partner unattended while doing this shit.
I’ve done kinky shit. It’s really not that fucking hard to not kill someone. Especially if you’re getting 11 grand for it, I’d expect a little thought and research put into the encounter.
“The victim had a plastic bag over his head for at least 8 minutes”
You could defend that as a “heat of the moment” kind of thing. It was the victim’s kink, after all. 4 years is not unjust, but I would have also accepted 2 years.
Considering that the article talks about the accusers trying for second degree murder, it looks like they were looking to get the maximum punishment rather than plain old justice. I don’t see why they would do that.
Because it was about sex and kink, which is icky.
That’s actually serious. It was something that makes them deeply uncomfortable and feels gross to them, and so they tried for a much harsher charge.
Very dumb but also very irresponsible. Not even the slightest bit of care or common sense.
Yes, that is true. It was very irresponsible. Like a child, like Pippi Longstockings: " I’ve never done this, so think I can do it", like Nike: “just do it”.
Well into “reckless disregard” territory, I’d say.