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kali_fornication@lemmy.world to Showerthoughts@lemmy.world · 4 months ago

They don't keep stats on prostitutes the way they do with football quarterbacks so we'll never know who the GOAT prostitute is

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They don't keep stats on prostitutes the way they do with football quarterbacks so we'll never know who the GOAT prostitute is

kali_fornication@lemmy.world to Showerthoughts@lemmy.world · 4 months ago
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  • melfie@lemy.lol
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    4 months ago

    I’m sure the welsh can share some stats on goat prostitutes, though I have to imagine sheep are preferred.

  • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 @pawb.social
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    4 months ago

    I am pretty sure that would be the woman that has the world record for having like 1000 dudes cum inside her in under 24 hours. A record I very much would like to beat. 😤

  • baggachipz@sh.itjust.works
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    4 months ago

    I got with a goat prostitute once, she was baaaaaaaaad

    • siha@feddit.uk
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      4 months ago

  • NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    I would gladly nominate your mother.

  • Wilco@lemmy.zip
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    4 months ago

    Its your mom!

    • dustycups@aussie.zone
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      4 months ago

  • lemmylommy@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    Number four prostitute in all of Kazakhstan is Natalya Sagdiyev.

  • MantisToboggon@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    We all know it’s your mom.

    • SirSamuel@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      I, too, nominate this person’s mother

    • d00phy@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      Slowest pitch in history.

      • MantisToboggon@lemmy.world
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        4 months ago

        Not as slow as your moms fatass.

    • 🇦🇺𝕄𝕦𝕟𝕥𝕖𝕕𝕔𝕣𝕠𝕔𝕠𝕕𝕚𝕝𝕖@hilariouschaos.com
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      4 months ago

      Beet me to it

      • BradleyUffner@lemmy.world
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        4 months ago

        That’s why she’s the best in the business!

  • phonics@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    If it’s a business theyre keeping track. Data just isnt public or consolidated.

  • slazer2au@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    Because one is subjective the other is not.

    • Stern@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      We could grade them like gymnasts or figure skaters. I’d watch competitive prostitution.

      • Pat_Riot@lemmy.today
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        4 months ago

        Pretty sure that’s just called pornography.

        • Stern@lemmy.world
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          4 months ago

          Pornography is competitive prostitution like movies are competitive plays.

          • Pat_Riot@lemmy.today
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            4 months ago

            I’m not fond of the cinema, myself, but I hear about new movies. What I hear is how much money they made on opening day. So yes, your comparison sits right with me.

      • crank0271@lemmy.world
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        4 months ago

        In a certain sense, I think many of us do.

        • atro_city@fedia.io
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          4 months ago

          Not “in a sense”. It is prostitution.

    • abbadon420@sh.itjust.works
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      4 months ago

      That’s why you keep stats and measure objective metrics. “I think this is the best player” or “I think this is the best whore” are both equally subjective. But one is backed up by statistics, the other is not, but could be and therbt negating the difference.

      • thenoirwolfess@lemmynsfw.com
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        4 months ago

        And then, if the scoring criteria can be subjective, that can lead to a similar issue with results. Kind of how those ice-skating competitions rely on 3 experts’ opinions rather than the mathematical accuracy of moves or timing accuracy of music synchronisation.

        I wonder what the criteria might be, so they don’t rely on keeping partner stats too lmao

  • Corkyskog@sh.itjust.works
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    4 months ago

    Gotta be Bonnie Blue she had a 1,000 man gangbang. Her body count is like 2k.

  • Midnight Wolf@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    I read that as “prostates” and was confused but intrigued

    • everett@lemmy.ml
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      4 months ago

      Reading this left me prostrate.

  • GottaHaveFaith@fedia.io
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    4 months ago

    Technically Eve fucked all the men in the world

    • village604@adultswim.fan
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      4 months ago

      Her own sons included.

  • makeshiftreaper@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    There’s a documentary on these 2 Dutch sisters in their 70s who have been in the game for over 100 years between them. So they’re probably up there:

    https://www.theguardian.com/society/2012/sep/17/oldest-prostitutes-amsterdam-70-twins

    • ChicoSuave@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      Ben Franklin died too early.

  • TheRealKuni@piefed.social
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    4 months ago

    I understand that Nancy Reagan was the throat GOAT.

    • ickplant@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      But did she charge? Guess we’ll never know.

  • Tiger@sh.itjust.works
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    4 months ago

    You could measure by how far it got you in life, so by some measures Melania could be considered a winner in that class. (First Lady, 40 million for a documentary, etc) I think she’s deplorable though.

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