Bluefalcon@discuss.tchncs.de to Not The Onion@lemmy.worldEnglish · 29 days agoTrump and other top Republicans will read passages in a marathon Bible eventapnews.comexternal-linkmessage-square83linkfedilinkarrow-up11arrow-down10file-text
arrow-up11arrow-down1external-linkTrump and other top Republicans will read passages in a marathon Bible eventapnews.comBluefalcon@discuss.tchncs.de to Not The Onion@lemmy.worldEnglish · 29 days agomessage-square83linkfedilinkfile-text
Halftime Donald Jesus Trump, nailed to the cross. Let’s make this happen! Or we can just read the Epstein files instead.
minus-squareGreenBeanMachine@lemmy.worlddeleted by creatorlinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up0·29 days agoDesperate to win back their Christian voters. Let’s hope they know what a bible actually looks like. They would read the Pulp Fiction movie script if you told them it was a bible.
minus-squarelost_faith@lemmy.calinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up0·29 days agoAlso, the Pulp Fiction reading Kegsbreath did, lol
minus-squaregrimpy@lemmy.myserv.onelinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up0·28 days agoPeter Kegsbreath, Secretary of the Department of Whores
minus-squareBluefalcon@discuss.tchncs.deOPlinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up0·29 days agoTo lazy to do it alive. https://www.wusa9.com/article/news/nation-world/president-trump-america-reads-the-bible-prerecorded-message/507-a2797b94-c8bb-4a65-bcb9-4e7c8f8550b7 The federal is about to pump millions into buying this shit. https://godblesstheusa.com/
minus-squareHubertManne@piefed.sociallinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up0·29 days agoto lazy. you know how many takes its gonna be for him to manage to read one correctly.
minus-squareGreenBeanMachine@lemmy.worlddeleted by creatorlinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up0·28 days agoHe’s not gonna be reading a single line, the whole thing will be AI generated using his voice.
minus-squareZirconium@lemmy.worldlinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up0·28 days agoHe might just die reading a Bible quote out loud. Don’t think he’s ever done it ever
minus-squareRegrettable_incident@lemmy.worldlinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up0·28 days agoTrump can even read the Bible upside down!
minus-squareBestBouclettes@jlai.lulinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up0·28 days agoShit on the Pope and pretty much everything Jesus advocated about, and read Bible verses performatively. I’m the Bible, Jesus whooped some ass because of this, he flipped tables and chased people with a stick.
minus-squareMirshe@lemmy.worldlinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up0·28 days agoI believe Christ used a phrase for these people in Matthew…something like “whitewashed tombs”? “Which look beautiful on the outside, but inside are full of the bones of the dead and everything unclean”? Is this ringing a bell for anyone?
minus-squarefartographer@lemmy.worldlinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up0·28 days agoNo, “ringing a bell” is when you tie a bell to someone you accidentally buried alive. Nowadays, you could just use an Pi zero and Home Assistant.
minus-squareprole@lemmy.blahaj.zonelinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up0·28 days ago win back They never lost most of them
Desperate to win back their Christian voters.
Let’s hope they know what a bible actually looks like. They would read the Pulp Fiction movie script if you told them it was a bible.
Also, the Pulp Fiction reading Kegsbreath did, lol
Peter Kegsbreath, Secretary of the Department of Whores
To lazy to do it alive.
https://www.wusa9.com/article/news/nation-world/president-trump-america-reads-the-bible-prerecorded-message/507-a2797b94-c8bb-4a65-bcb9-4e7c8f8550b7
The federal is about to pump millions into buying this shit.
https://godblesstheusa.com/
to lazy. you know how many takes its gonna be for him to manage to read one correctly.
He’s not gonna be reading a single line, the whole thing will be AI generated using his voice.
He might just die reading a Bible quote out loud. Don’t think he’s ever done it ever
Trump can even read the Bible upside down!
Shit on the Pope and pretty much everything Jesus advocated about, and read Bible verses performatively.
I’m the Bible, Jesus whooped some ass because of this, he flipped tables and chased people with a stick.
I believe Christ used a phrase for these people in Matthew…something like “whitewashed tombs”? “Which look beautiful on the outside, but inside are full of the bones of the dead and everything unclean”? Is this ringing a bell for anyone?
No, “ringing a bell” is when you tie a bell to someone you accidentally buried alive. Nowadays, you could just use an Pi zero and Home Assistant.
They never lost most of them